ddrboy's Diaryland Diary
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AIDS
Fuck! This is the second time I've had to do this...I'm getting pissed cause since I'm on the computer so much, my right wrist is starting to hurt and I want to finish this!
Ok, AIDS, HIV! Fuck, I hate them. I have lost two people to it already, and today I found out I might lose someone else to it! A boy I once liked told me today that his test came back positive! Ugh, but he is getting retested. I hope it's negative, but you can't tell for sure! He told me that he always uses condoms and that he only goes bareback with this one guy. This one guy is "married" so he's supposed to be clean, yeah right! That is just bullshit! Ugh, ok, well, now I haven't been the safest either. And I have only used condoms once, and then I tested negative and I have only had one guy in me without a condom since I promised myself no more barebacking!
Ain't that fucked up? It was Hottie...but it was just something that happened when we were playing with each other. He had his cock on my hole and we were getting hot and you know...he pushed, I slid closer. Then he went in, and I loved it, but it was just too fast. Maybe that's why he said he can't see himself with me. That or just other stuff, but oh well, I am starting to feel different towards him...I guess I'm not liking him as much as I used to. Which is good, cause that way I don't get hurt! I am so tired of getting hurt, and maybe this time I won't get hurt. I am learning to control my emotions and that's a good thing!
Ok, I didn't go out with Hottie these past few days, his truck is fucking up on him...anyway, I just wasn't up to it. I've been really tired lately, maybe it's the diabetes, but I think it's cause I'm on the phone every night with Cutie till 5am! LOL, I think that's it! Ok, time for me to end this and start to get ready to go to Hotties house, we are going to the movies tonight!
Ok, night Bitches!
5:10 p.m. - May 08, 2002
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