ddrboy's Diaryland Diary
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Fighting them Urges
I have a problem.
I am having my urges again.
I'm getting them urges I used to have to go and find dick. Let me go back into the past and explain what I mean.
It all started in 1999! I used to work in the city of Covina, out here in California. I used to work from 9-5pm. Everyday, I used to catch the bus and take it to the station, in order to catch another one home. Well, one day, I needed to go to the restroom. Lo and behold...I saw a guy standing in the urinal, with his dick out. Oh, but he wasn't peeing, he was STROKIN IT! So, of course, I stare, and fighting them urges!
I just go into the middle stall of 3. I'm in there, sitting, and looking through the crack of the door and the thing that holds it up. He can see in the stall, just as I could see him stroking it, and that's when I start stroking it.
Just to let you know, there was people coming in and out of the restroom. Apparantly, people know what's going on and they either watch, join, or just mind their own business. Well, I was sitting there, jacking off, when he comes and knocks on my door. I open it for him, knowing very well what his plans were. So, as soon as he stepped in, I took his dick in my mouth and started sucking him off. He grabbed my hair and rammed his dick in my mouth. I was fucking getting close to cumming, so when I told him that, he stopped fucking my face and told me to follow him.
I got up, put my dick in my pants and followed him. Now, I was scared. I didn't know where he was leading me, and I just knew that something was going to happen.
Something did happen.
Cum. That's what happened.
And lots of it! What happened was, when we got to the park, the park that is behind the bus station. Anyway, when we got there, I started fucking the guy, and another guy dropped his pants behind me. He flipped out his dick and stuck it in me. But I when he put it in, I moved so he wouldn't get it in there. Well, that's when another guy got behind the guy that's trying to fuck me. Then another goes behind him, and another, and another, till there are 6 of us, including me. Ok, now, you need to know, this was during the springtime and it was aroung 5:30-6pm and at a park. We were all fucking and jacking off, while other guys were watching and jacking off as well. We went at it for a while and then we all came up each others asses, except for mine. I didn't let anyone cum up my ass, cause I didn't wanna get anything.
I did that sort of thing for almost two years, and the last time I was there was this past February. I think...
Well, the thing is, that everyonce in a while, I get that feeling in my dick that tells me to go, to go and find an ass to fuck, a mouth to stick my dick in or something like that.
I HATE THAT FEELING
Especially now that I have Red. No other man is worth losing Red for. I love him and I can't fuck this up. It's hard for me not to go back to the lifestyle that was part of my life for a while. But like I've said before, Red is worth it all. I want to keep him for as long as I can!
I don't know what to say. I know that Red reads my diary and that all that I have said will no doubt add doubt to his mind. I just fucked myself and I can just delete this entry before posting it, but what good would that do?
Wait, it might save my relationship.
But I needed to get all that out. I just wish Red could trust me a whole lot more. That will take time, but it will be worth it.
Love you,
Richard!
P.S.
Click here! I hope you don't let Drunk Santa fall off the roof!
9:41 p.m. - Thursday, Dec. 05, 2002
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